Me Me Me Me! It's all about ME!

Wow! Nice diggs, eh? This new template is starting to grow on me. Like fungus. Is it supposed to itch this much?

The following meme was stolen from Snavylyn. I've stolen so many things from her, she's even in my word cloud.

But, before we begin, I have this theory. Ahem...
Harvard. Fraternities. Naked girls. Harvard class schedule. Harvard. Naked. Beer.
Ok. That should do it. I'll let you know how this experiment turns out.

3 things

~3 names you don't answer to:
*Dat bitch ova der
*Sissy - I have a little sister, and for the longest time she wanted to call me 'sissy'. That name irritates me to no end. I taught her to call me 'sister dearest'.
*Veronica - Apparently, Erica sounds like Veronica and this confuses Mexicans.

~3 parts of your heritage:
*Spanish
*American Indian
*Spoiled brat

~3 things that scare me:
*Yo' mama
*Things that go bump in the night
*Looking old

~3 of your everyday essentials:
*Underwears
*Diet Dr. Pepper
*Cute boys

~3 things you are wearing right now:
*My heart on my sleeve
*A new bra
*My bling

~3 of your favorite songs
*Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield
*Crash [into me] - Dave Matthews Band
*Crash - Gwen Stefani

~3 things about the opposite sex that appeal to you:
*Fat paycheck
*A cute older brother
*A multi-billion dollar family business

~3 things you want in a relationship (other that real love):
*Half of everything
*Short-order cook
*A limo with driver

~3 of your favorite hobbies:
*Making out
*Working [it] out
*Sneaking out

~3 places you want to go:
*Under there [I just made you say 'underwear']
*Nashville [Why? What's there?]
*Espana [Spanish for Spain. How ironic.]

~3 things you want to do before you die:
*Own my own business
*Live among the natives. [of New York]
*Win the 'Dancing with the Stars' trophy.

~3 ways that you are unstereotypically a female
*I can change a tire, check my oil, and replace a radiator hose. [But I'm stereotypically female cause I'll call you to do it first.]
*I can fish better than you. And, yes, I cast my own line and bait my own hook.
*I expect to go to atleast second base on a first date.

~2 truths and 1 lie (in any order)
*I love him.
*I love him not.
*He loves me.

All Hail DaMasta!

Ten Top Trivia Tips about DaMasta!

1. The opposite sides of DaMasta always add up to seven!
2. Human beings are the only animals that copulate while facing DaMasta!
3. Only one child in twenty will be born on the day predicted by DaMasta!
4. Scientists have discovered that DaMasta can smell the presence of stoopidity in children.
5. DaMasta is the traditional gift for a couple on their third wedding anniversary.
6. Duelling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are DaMasta.
7. DaMasta can clean her ears with her tongue, which is over thirty-nine inches long.
8. In the kingdom of Bhutan, all citizens officially become DaMasta on New Year's Day.
9. Dolphins sleep at night just below the surface of DaMasta, and frequently rise to the surface for air!
10. The first domain name ever registered was DaMasta.com!

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

Half Nekkid Thursday: You know what they say about men with big hands....?

The NBA All-star game came thru town last weekend.

You can clearly see how big some player's hands are compared to mine.

Seen below is my hand compared to Kobe Bryant's.

Seen below is my hand compared to Tim Duncan's.

So tell me: Why did that hoebag at the hotel in Colorado choose Kobe?

Clearly she made a mistake.

Wanna compare body parts? Click the button.

A little bit of this.. and a little bit of that...

I am about thiiiiiiiis close to killing Stoopid Hr Chick. I swear to God, I'll make it look like a horrible stapler accident. Every fucking five minutes, she coming to my desk asking me stooopid ass questions like, "What's a company letter head?" and "Where do I find ink toner?"

Yesterday she asked me to proof-read a letter for her. I had to bit my tongue as not to laugh at her idiot mistakes. But I refused to look at it. I'm not correcting it for her. No way. Make her look good? Shit. She can sink her own ship.

I tried to record an audioblog this morning. Actually, I recorded five. But I sounded stoopid, so I didn't post them. [I know, what could be stoopider than hearing me rap?]

I am just aboot burnt out on my job. It's just a phase, and I can't wait till it passes. I love my job. I do. There's just been a lot of drama lately, and I'm not e-v-e-n in the mood to deal with everyone's problems. I just want to come to work, kick ass at my job, go home, and sleep soundly. That's been harder to do the past couple of weeks. But I have signed on to help out with some big projects around here, so hopefully that will get my spirits back up! I can't wait, really, and tomorrow is our first meeting, and I'm looking forward to working with this group of people from my office.

I got invited to go to the Houston Rodeo Cook-off on Friday after work with a bunch of my co-workers. It's supposed to rain on Friday, but I'm not going to let that ruin my fun! Last time I checked, I don't melt! LOL. It's cool cause we don't have to drive there, the Metro park and ride will take us to the Rodeo grounds for only a couple of bucks. And since we are 'with' the cookers, we get everything for free! Free beer, free BBQ, free beer, free... beer! Sounds like a good time to me.

Oh, I found this lame quiz, but it kinda does sound like me! So, here ya go:

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have high extroversion.You are outgoing and engaging, with both strangers and friends.You truly enjoy being with people and bring energy into any situation.Enthusiastic and fun, you're the first to say "let's go!" Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness.You're generally good at balancing work and play.When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done.But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have high agreeableness.You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism.You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium.You are generally broad minded when it come to new things.But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it.You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue.

Five Factor Personality Quiz

I fucking hate these things..

*sigh* But, I've got nothin'.

Editors note: Some questions were removed. And by removed, I mean, out-right deleted. Without re-numbering. So, sometimes it will skip from #44 to #48 or something like that. Gah. I really do fuggin hate these things. But if you have one you want me to do on my blog, just sent it my way. I'm such a sucka.


1. What time did you get up this morning? 4:45 am. I went to the gym from 5am to 6am. I just started this yesterday, and when I got home after work, I went straight to bed.

2. Diamonds or pearls? Jewelry is MY best friend. I don't care what it is, just buy me some why don'tcha.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? I went to the premier for the upcoming movie Alpha Dog last week. It sucked. It had Justin Timberlake in it, but it sucked.

4. What is your favorite TV show? Grey's Anatomy. w00t. Break me off a piece of McDreamy. [But, I secretly heart George. Isn't he the best? I just wanna cuddle with him.]

5. What did you have for breakfast? Breakfast taco. MMmm..

6. What is your middle name? Rose.

7. What is your favorite cuisine? Mexifood.

8. What foods do you dislike? I don't like fish. I like other seafood, but just not fish. I don't like the texture of cooked spinich, either. Tastes like someone already chewed it up and spit it back out onto my plate. Bleh.

9. What is your favorite type of music? I like anything I can dance to. I like to shake my bon-bon.

10. What kind of car do you drive? Ford Fuckus. He's a pain in my ass, but he gets me where I need to go. And you wouldn't believe the hatred he puts up with from random parking lot cars. He's always getting run into, scratched up, dinged, you name it.

11. Who is your hero? My dad. When he's not making fun of me, we enjoy making fun of other family members. He's incredibly wise, and he taught me all about baseball and how to check my oil.

12. Favorite magazine to peruse? Cosmo. I'm such a girl sometimes.

13. If you had a day all to yourself, what would you do? I think the question should read "who" would I do. Well, that's classified information.

14. What was your last miracle? Huh? I think anytime I get in the car and arrive at my destination unharmed, it's a miracle. I'm deathly afraid of dying in a car accident. I'm sure my fears would be abated if I didn't text message while I drove, kept my hands on the stearing wheel, and did the speed limit every once in a while.

15. Favorite all time movie? The 5th element. How smokin' hot is Mia Jovovich in that film? Gah!

16. Favorite time of year? The time with the most paid days off.

17. Favorite age that has passed? I liked being 17. I had a kick ass management job, my own car, the love of my [highschool] life, and boys on the side. I had money, friends, and a bad ass pager [ha! remember those?]. I thought I was the fucking shit. Damn, those were good times.

18. Something you think you would be crazy without... my celly. I don't even know how I survived so long without one, either. Now, I can't imagine not being able to pick up my cell and call someone on the spot. Oh, and I'm a text and picture messaging FREAK! I also have Aol Instant Messaging on my phone, so I never miss out on someone trying to reach me.

19. Somebody you would be crazy without? I'm already going crazy without him.

20. Favorite sandwich? I'm not really a sandwich person. Lol.. I'd probably choose peanut butter and jelly.

21. What characteristics do you despise? Indecisiveness. [I'm already indecisive enough. I don't need someone else being that too. One of us has to make the fucking decisions around here.]

22. Favorite item of clothing? I have this really comfy Happy Bunny t-shirt that says, "Your anger makes me happy." It's just a funny reminder to not get caught up in other people's drama or moods. [It made me think of my mother.]

23. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go: I'd like to visit Italy someday, but my first stop would be Spain. I'd like to test out my Spanish skillz and meet people from my culture. [And, no, my culture isn't Mexico.]

25. Favorite brand of clothing? I like Banana Replublic's style, but most of their stuff is made of wool, and I'm deathly allergic to wool.

26. Where would you retire to? A mansion in Beverly Hills.

27. Favorite time of day? Sleepy time.

28. Where were you born? At St. Joseph's hospital in Houston, Tx.

29. Favorite sport to watch? Baseball.

32. What laundry detergent do you use? All. The dye free kind. I'm not allergic or anything, but things that could possibly make me itch get me paranoid.

33. Coke or Pepsi? Diet ? Diet Black Cherry Vanilla Coke.

34. Are you a morning person or night owl? I'm actually more of a morning person. But on the weekends, I can stay up all night if need be. As long as the drinks are flowin' and there's music to dance to, I'm up.

36. Do you have pets? Why yes, yes I do. I have a rat named Chibby Chibberson.

37. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with everyone? I'm almost done with this fucking long ass questionaire!

38. What did you want to be when you were little? A corporate lawyer. Or any profession where I could look professional and scare the shit out of people. I guess that could go for a mob boss, too, huh?

39. Favorite Candy Bar? Almond Joy.

40. What is your best childhood memory? I don't really remember much of my childhood. Hmm.. I wonder why... LOL. Probably my fondest memory was my fifth birthday, and we were all getting in the car to go to Chuck E. Cheese. I was in the back seat, and my parents were putting some stuff in the trunk to take over there. I looked up at the rear view mirror, and I saw them putting a guitar with a big bow on it in the trunk! I was sooo excited, and I didn't even say a word until I finally unwrapped it at the end of the birthday party!

41. What are the different jobs you have had in your life? Movie theater assistant manager, car prep, intern, rental car assistant manager, Nextel retail manager, receptionist.

42. What color underwear are you wearing? Nude.

43. Nicknames: Crackhead, Tinkerbell, Fuzzyhead, Super E.

44. Eye color: Brown [with flecks of magic.]

46. Last person you went to dinner with: The Cuz's spawn. I took care of him this past weekend.

47. What are you listening to right now? The clicky clack of my keyboard as I type this.

48. Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Who the fuck cares? When's lunch?

49. What job would you have if you could: Heiress.

If you'd like to tag yerself, go right ahead. [I won't look.]

Going down the only road I've ever known..

*looks around* Wow. This shit looks familiar. Like I've been here before. Like I've been here every fucking day of my life. Ok, not that often, but often enough. Every damn time I think I'm ammuned to it. But it taunts me; it looks so alluring. With its promises of good times and lust ever-lasting. I can't believe I fell for that shit again. Lol... I must be a hell of a lot dumber than I thought.

The following is my journal entry from last night.

I have no idea why I let myself fall into the same fucking love patterns again and again. Maybe I've done so much wrong in my life that Karma is kicking my ass all the way to the grave.

It seems like I let myself fall for the most amazingly kind-hearted, emotionally unavailable men I can find. Sure, assholes and deadbeats flock to my door by the thousands, but what's worse than putting my heart and hope on the line for someone who never intends to be with me?

It is a bitter-sweet connection that has occupied my life for the past couple of months. [And yes, he's probably reading this post right now!]

He's my match. He has all the qualities I've hoped to find. He's kind, funny, incredibly attrative and he finds my sense of humor and personality endearing. All wonderful qualities to possess. All except one. He's attached. Not married, but damn near close enough. And once again, I have fallen for someone who is completely out of my reach.

The physical distance isn't even my main concern, either. He lives in a different state, and it's not all that far away - but there might as well be an ocean between us. An ocean full of complications and consequences. An ocean full of what-ifs and never-will-bes. Sadly, it's a place with which I'm all too familiar.

For those of you unfamiliar, it's a place filled with false hope, disaster, self-doubt, and the most amazing love I've ever felt. One minute I'm floating on a bed of clouds and the next I've fallen into the same fucking self-destructing behavior I've grown accustomed to. But this man in particular has made me the happiest I've been in a fucking long time. Probably ever. Yes, the happiest ever. [And, by the way, why do we always try to convince ourselves that this man, this time, it's different. This situation is different. This time it will work out. Aren't we just setting ourselves up for disappointment?]

And this time down the lane of unfullfilled love stories, I know myself and I am completely aware of what is happening.

In this age of self-indulgence and instant gratification, I've allowed myself to sit back and watch my heart submurse itself into something I know it can't handle. I know this is going to hurt. And I know I'll be the one left empty-handed at the end of the night. I know he'll end up marrying her for fear of being alone, and I'll be left picking up my own fucking pieces. Again. A-fucking-gain. And I'll be the one saying 'I told you so' to myself. And I'll be the one settling for someone else within my reach. Always wondering what-if.

Is it fair to ask him to be with me instead of her? Of course not. It feels right, but it's not. Why do I always fucking put myself in these impossible situations? I know I can't win. But, dammit, I try. There's nothing to be gained by going thru the heartache. He won't leave her, and he has no intention of being with me. He won't say it out loud, but he doesn't even consider it a possibility.

It's just a reminder that I can't be the person I think I am. A person who knows when to stop at the line and to never cross it. However tempting and absolutely perfect the other side might seem.

I can feel a heart-break coming on. It won't be long now.

Word cloud. Word. Cloud.

If you made a word cloud out of existing words on your blog, what would it look like?

If people had to describe your blog by what words were on your word cloud,

what would they say?

If you had to pick your favorite word from MY word cloud,

what would it be?

Thanks, Spinning. You spin me right round, babe. Make your own here.

Half Nekkid Thursday: Rub a Dub Flower..

DaMasta's in da shower.

Wanna suds up with me? Ask Os, he'll show you how.

Weekend Update: Let it S--hine?

I had to ask Breazy what snow was on Friday, because this winter has been one of the mildest winters I've ever seen in Houston. Granted, our perception of cold [usually anything below 50 degrees, and people start bundling up] is probably waay different than yours.

I talked to Bsoholic and Breazy, and they both had snow over the weekend, but let me tell you, the weather was much different here in Houston. Last weekend, it was 70 degrees and sunny, and The Cuz, her hubby, her spawn and I all went to the beach in Galveston. It's only a twenty minute drive from my house, but it provides both a great weekend hangout and an excellent shopping experience. This past Saturday, it actually got a little cold [38-42 degrees], but it was sunny and the skies were clear, so we went to Kemah [a little touristy town on Galveston Bay].

Here are some pictures I took of both weekends:


The picture above is a shot of The Strand. It's downtown Galveston, an historical touristy street with trendy shops and small boutiques. The Coronaville Store [named after the Mexican beer] is my favorite store because [you can barely see it in the picture] it has sand on the ground, from the entrance to the cash register inside the store.

The picture above is the Flagship Hotel on the Seawall in Galveston. It's pretty much one of the only [and largest] hotels that's actually on the beach. It sits on a long pier and that's where my family goes fishing most of the time.

Anyone who's ever stayed there before will tell you that the hotel can actually make you seasick, because as the wind blows and the tides come in and out, the hotel sways back and forth on its own.

The beach has such a calming effect on me. I just stood there, wading in the water, watching the seagulls under the pier.

The sunset was beautiful that night. It was nothing but ocean as far as the eye could see, and the sun was actually setting behind us, but it made an awesome range of colors on the horizon.

This past weekend, we went to Clear Lake, my old stomping grounds. Above, you can see a drive-by picture of the lake. It was about 44 degrees, but the skies were clear and the sun was shinning, and nothing could stop us from having a good time!

Above pictured, are hundreds of boats that lined the bay. This is Kemah, Tx, famous for its boardwalk and small town shops. We shopped our little hearts out and then went to the boardwalk for some fine mexican dining! I left very broke, and very full!

The streets were lined with these fun cut-outs of Captains, Popeye, Fairys, and Mermaids! Ahoy, mateys! I'm tired of chasing booty out at sea! Hand me my rum, and scrub the deck!

Valentine's Day: 2006

I wrote this last month one night while thinking of him. It seems we have just met, yet he has very quickly become one of the greatest people I've ever known. We make each other very happy, but from afar. I can't tell him enough how much he means to me. I am the happiest I've been in a very long time. And he's the reason.

He's read this poem already, but this is the first time anyone else has seen it.

It is currently untitled.
















He brushed the hair from my face, and I quivered.

I breathed his name.
He whispered our fate.

I held his hand, and he promised to never leave. He wished to live by the ocean and watch me glisten every day.

Every hour of our lives would be the best hour ever lived.

He saw his love for me and my love for him looking back in my eyes.

I spoke softly while he slept. He dreamt of us, and of still air, and of never-ending nights.



We met the day before forever.



He makes me soft. I keep him warm.
We're lost in a place that we've made all our own.

I've seen his face before, but we've never met. Our friends adore him, but there's something more familiar that no one's ever seen. There's something about him that brings me home.

It's him. Him alone. All of him.

And he isn't even mine.
And we've never even met.

Inside the Blogger's Mind

T. Leach tagged me, and I helped.

Seriously, this was blatantly stolen from T. Leach. Thanks, man... and no, I won't show you my boobs.

What is your favorite word? Tacobelly. [noun]. As in, I'm allergic to Taco Bell. It makes my belly swollen. And then, I'm left with a tacobelly.

What is your least favorite word? Not. As in, we're NOT gonna have Taco Bell for dinner tonight. Or, no, I'm NOT gonna make out with you. Or, you're NOT the hottest girl I've ever slept with.

What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? I'm not a creative person. I like to admire [and sometimes steal] people's artistic work. I'm not really that spiritual, either. I'm a pretty positive person, and it takes a lot to get me down because most of the time it's easy for me just to make jokes and laugh it off. What turns me on emotionally is just other positive people. I like to surround myself with the laid-back, fun-loving, just-gonna-go-out-and-have-a-great-time-where-ever-the-road-takes-us types.

What is your favorite curse word? Are you serious? My favorite curse word? Ha! I try not to curse as much as I used to, so my new favorite phrases are, "Son of a BISCUIT!" and "Mother farker!" and "Geezus, I really fuggin sporked that up!"

What sound or noise do you love? I like the sound of rain. It makes me sleepy... unless I have to pee... then it makes me pee-pee.

What sound or noise do you hate? The stoopid hr chick's voice. Gaaah! Stop talking, you fuggin' re-tard!"

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? I'd like to try veternarianism. Huh? Is that even a word? I think I used that in a sentence incorrectly.

What profession would you not like to do? Proctology.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? You're fuggin funny as hel-- uh, as... --

Half Nekkid Thursday: Ready for Work

Gotta look purty.

Wanna play dress up in front of the camera? Tell 'em DaMasta sent you.

Audioblog Wednesday: Erica FX

Things to look forward to on this post:

• Someone speaking Spanish. [or Portuguese, I can't tell]
• Sound FX.
• Another round of Car Idol.
  
  
  

T-Shirt Tuesday: GALVESTON, TX EDITION

Good morning, everyone, and welcome to the Galveston, Tx edition of T-shirt Tuesday.

[The original T-shirt Tuesday is featured on Snav and Lime's blog Insane Asylime.]

These pics were snapped on Saturday when The Cuz and I drove down to Galveston. The Strand, the historical [and mucho tourist-o] downtown part of Galveston, is lined with mini-boutiques and surf shops. Most of which, have very interesting t-shirts for sale. Here are three of my favorites.

Things I Avoided by Not Watching the Super Bowl Last Night

1. Falling asleep

2. My mom screaming at the t.v., "Go! GO! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! GET 'EM!", for no apparent reason because she a. doesn't know anyfuckingthing about football and b. roots for both teams at the same time.

3. A hangover.

4. Disappointment after rooting for the Seahawks ONLY because most of my readers live in and/or near Seattle.

5. The Jackie Chan Diet Pepsi commercial.

6. Arguing with my little sister about what the difference is between a touchback and a safety.

7. Losing money on bets.

8. Men with beer breath.

9. Going on beer runs for the men with beer breath.

10. The four hour pre-game show and the weird half-time show.

My Perfect Man

I got tagged by the beautiful and sassy Snavylyn.

The rules state that I must choose a gender of my preference, and list 8 different traits that would make him/her my perfect partner. In theory, this should be easy.

I choose a man. Cause, ya know, I like 'em like that.

1. He must be taller than me. [I'm five foot five and five seven with heels, so if he's even a HAIR shorter than me, it grosses me out.]

2. He should be good with his hands. [In every way possible. And I don't mind a man with rough hands.]

3. He should have a nice grille. [And I don't mean on his car. Although, he should have a nice car, but we'll get to that later.]

4. He needs to travel lightly. [I can't be bogged down with other people's luggage, if you know what I mean.]

5. He should have a j-o-b. [I just can't stress this one enough. I've done the whole "I'll support you while you look for a job and you get depressed because you can't find one and you turn into a ragging druggie because you're depressed and now you're just sitting there feeling sorry for yourself while I'm working full time and going to college at the same time." I just don't want to go thru that again.]

6. He needs to have a nice car. [He doesn't need to be rollin' on dubs, or have a slammin' stereo system. A nice, clean, fuel-efficient sedan is perfectly acceptable. Oh, and no Infinity drivers need apply. Read about the last guy I dated who drove an Infinity. And read about it again here.]

7. He needs to interested in having fun and/or laugh at my jokes. [This sounds like common sense, right? Wrong. I must be a loser magnet, because all I date are guys who are 1. too old to have fun, 2. too geeky to have fun, 3. too busy to have fun. I like to go out. I like to boogy.]

8. He needs to be nice. [Not like "hmm .. I think he might be gay" nice. Like, get me flowers for no reason nice. Make me dinner nice. Rub my back till I fall asleep nice.]

Also considered: Must have rock hard abs. Must be cuter than me. Must have a brain.

Half Nekkid Thursday: Rolling in the Sheets

Brunettes just wanna have fun.

[If you look closely, you might spot a grey hair. Ack!]

Wanna take pics of yourself rolling in the sheets? Ask him how.

Audioblog Wednesday: Car Idol

Oh, yeah... this gets good.

Wait for it...

Wait for it...