1. What's on your wish list of gifts do you want really badly this year?
A cute boy in my stocking, a new camera phone, and more pictures of ThomCat.

2. What do you think the meaning of Christmas is?
One Day Sales, entertaining the family, and reflecting on the year.

3. Naughty or Nice?
You wanna find out?

4. To believe or Not to believe in Santa?
There better not be no fat man going down my chimney.

5. Do you plan to travel somewhere for Christmas?
The depths of Hell. Also known as my parents’ house.

6. Do you leave out milk and cookies?
No, I leave vodka and tonic. Makes for better gifts under the tree.

7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
Oh, man, I’m such a Christmas song junkie. I like Blue Christmas, Let it Snow, and Sleigh Ride.

8. Are you dreaming of a white Christmas?
Yes. Last Christmas Eve it snowed in Houston. All the way to Galvestion. The pictures below were taken in Galveston last year on Christmas morning.

9. Favorite reindeer?
Blitzen. What a kick ass name. If I ever have a spawn of my own, I’m naming him Blitzen.

10. Worse thing about Christmas?
My mom. God bless her for putting together extravagant dinners for Thanksgiving and Christmas. But she’s not good under pressure. And guess who she takes it out on? Ah, stress-induced fits of anger, my favorite.

11. Do you give to charities this time of the year?
I give to charities all times of the year. I have one charity in particular that I contribute to every year, and also one that I give to through work. But this is the only time of year that I give straight to the homeless.

12. When I say Santa - you say?
Creepy fat guy.

13. When I say Rudolph - you say?
Opportunist.

14. When I say Frosty - you say?
Just like I like it.

15. When I say Jack Frost - you say?
Frost bite.

16. When I say Mrs. Claus - you say?
Poor lonely broad.

17. When I say Grinch - you say?
Evil bastard.

18. When I say Scrooge - you say?
My mother.

19. When I say Christmas tree - you say?
That's flocked up.

20. Do you put up a tree?
I had a tree. A fake one. With fiber optics. But it didn’t make it from my last apartment to my new apartment. Must be in apartment heaven, where all lost apartment items go when they are accidentally left behind. I also have a whole set of pots and pans in apartment heaven.

21. Do you decorate your house or your yard?
Since I have an apartment, [and no house or yard], I decorate my sofa.

22. What's your favorite Christmas drink?
Whatever can get me drunk the quickest.

23. Favorite or ideal Christmas dinner?
I think we should have turkey and all the fixings like normal people. My mother thinks we should have lasagna.

24. How many people do you usually buy for?
I usually only buy for about ten people. A few close cousins. A few close friends. But most of my money is spent spoiling my little sister.

25. Do you think the naughty should get a lump of coal?
No, I think the naughty should get a new camera phone.

26. What would be your idea of an ideal Christmas?
Getting leid in Hawaii.