I totally stole this from Bobby. And I don't care, either.



1. Do you try to look hot when you go to the grocery store just in case someone recognizes you from your blog? How hot does one have to look if no one knows what you look like?

2. Are the photos you post Photoshopped or otherwise altered?Yes, the blank picture you see next to my name was altered to look hotter so people will recognize me.

3. Do you like it when creeps or dorks email you?I don't think anyone else emails me.

4. Do you lie in your blog? Of course I do. I lie all the time. And I suck at it. But that never stopped me.

5. Are you passive-aggressive in your blog? In my blog, yes. In real life, no, I'm agressive-agressive. It leads to better make up sex.

6. Do you ever threaten to quit writing so people will tell you not to stop? No. That's stupid. But if ya'll don't read this post, then I might quit writing all together.

7. Are you in therapy? If not, should you be? If so, is it helping? No, according to my ex-therapist I should be, and hell no.

8. Do you delete mean comments? Do you fake nice ones?Yes and no. The "Even tho he flamed me" link on the side is from someone who wrote a mean comment on my blog the other week. I deleted it, but now he links me. Weird. I should fake nice ones, tho. Or go anonymous on other people's blogs and say things like, "Hey, ya'll should check out Quesadillas for Breakfast! I heard she looks hot in heels."

9. Have you ever rubbed one out while reading a blog? Yes.

10. If your readers knew you in person, would they like you more or like you less?Ew, this is a toughy. Probably more, cause we'd sit around and get drunk and say funny shit to each other all night.

11. Do you have a job?Yes, professional blogger. Oh, yeah, and I answer the phone sometimes when it rings.

12. If someone offered you a decent salary to blog full-time without restrictions, would you do it? Can I get a "HELL YEAH!"?

13. Which bloggers do you want to meet in real life? Aw, man, too many to list. Bobby, Jinxy, Thom, BS and fam, Breazy, Lime, Sherri, Jerk, Wirthy, Seth, Idiot, ....

14. Which bloggers have you made out with? (a)In real life? (b)In fantasy? a. None, I don't think. Unless one of you was the guy at the Pasadena Cook Off this past weekend....what was his name...? b. Yes.

15. Do you usually act like you have more money or less money than you really have? More. All the time. I over-spend on everything.

16. Does your family read your blog? Yes, Krazy K [my sister], reads my blog sometimes, I think. But she never leaves a comment. And one of my cousins has read my blog, too. She thinks I am the funniest person she has ever met.

17. How old is your blog? Two months old, I think. I hate when people with spawn tell me their two yr old is 24 months old. When/if I have spawn, I will use fractions. So, this blog is 1/6 of a year old. I think.

18. Do you get more than 1000 page views per day? Do you care?No, and yes. I've always wanted to be an international superstar.

19. Do you have another secret blog in which you write about being depressed, slutty, or a liar? Oh, I thought that's what this one was supposed to be about.

20. Have you ever given another blogger money for his/her writing? No, I thought cut and paste was free.

21. Do you report the money you earn from your blog on your taxes? You can make money off this thing? Holy hell. Foiled again!

22. Is blogging narcissistic? Of course. Isn't it supposed to be? Atleast, it would be if any of it were true.

23. Do you feel guilty when you don't post for a long time? Long time, like 30 mins? No. That just means I'm actually answering the phone when it rings. Long time like 3 days? No. That just means it's the weekend.

24. Do you like John Mayer? Only when he's naked.

25. Do you have enemies? Don't all Masters of the Universe have enemies?

26. Are you lonely? Nope. I have one loyal friend, a ton of imaginary internet friends, and a whole city full of annoying relatives.

27. Why bother?Are you kidding me? I get to cuss and talk about myself all day.

Bonus28. If they were to make a movie of your life, who would play the mailman? Zack Braff. So I can say funny shit like, "So, mailman, when do you get off?" And he would laugh. And we would make out.