quesadillas for breakfast

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Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Leave a comment. Pay a fine.

This morning the roads were icy and some exits were closed here in Houston. I fought tooth and nail, but finally when it got warmer at 10am (and since ice melts), I came into work. It's freezing cold and rainy and I'm stuck here doing actual work. Hehe.. I'm in the Travel office by myself though, so it's not all bad. And since "they" made me come in, I figure I'd have a little fun..

This survey of sorts was stolen from The Great and Powerful Os to liven up things a bit on ze blogosphere :) All you have to do is add up all the "fines" that apply to you and post them in the comments. Don't worry.. an explanation is not needed (although it might make things a bit interesting).

Smoked pot -- $10
Did acid -- $5
Ever had sex at church -- $25
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you -- $40
Had sex with someone on MySpace -- $25
Had sex for money -- $100
Vandalized something -- $20
Had sex on your parents' bed -- $10
Beat up someone -- $20
Been jumped -- $10
Crossed dressed -- $10
Given money to stripper -- $25
Been in love with a stripper -- $20
Kissed some one who's name you didn't know -- $0.10
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work -- $15
Ever drive drunk -- $20
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk -- $50
Used toys while having sex -- $30
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- $20
Went skinny dipping -- $5
Had sex in a pool -- $20
Kissed someone of the same sex -- $10
Had sex with someone of the same sex -- $20
Cheated on your significant other -- $10
Masturbated -- $10
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend -- $20
Done oral -- $5
Got oral -- $5
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving -- $25
Stole something -- $10
Had sex with someone in jail -- $25
Made a nasty home video -- $15
Had a threesome -- $50
Had sex in the wild -- $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex -- $25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars -- $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older -- $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 -- $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time -- $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- $25
Went streaking -- $5
Went streaking in broad daylight -- $15
Been arrested -- $5
Spent time in jail -- $15
Peed in the pool -- $0.50
Played spin the bottle -- $5
Done something you regret -- $20
Had sex with your best friend -- $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work -- $25
Had anal sex -- $80
Lied to your mate -- $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good -- $25

My total: $535.60!!
Observations:

At the beginning of this survey, most of the fines didn't apply to me.. I thought my total would be a little lower.

And then, there was some serious memory-jogging going on just reading thru these "fines." I thought.. I've never had sex with anyone from Myspace. But then I remembered that I reconnected with this guy I knew in high school who I thought was cute and we "hung out" a few times.. turns out I did have sex with someone from Myspace.

And back in the day when I had sex on my parents' bed, I didn't think it was as gross then as I think it is now. EW!

And who hasn't peed in a pool or kissed someone who's name you didn't know?? (we've all been to college, right?)

And I swear the only reason I cross-dressed was for Halloween!

Secret Lover Boy was 11 years older than me.

And I've had quite a few "sexual adventures", but that doesn't mean I've enjoyed them all and/or still do them now!

And when I worked at the movie theater after high school, I had sex with this boy I was seeing behind the screen in Theater number 11. :O (Having sex with a co-worker at work)

And of course I've been streaking.. I think it was a rite of passage during my band days.. (this one time at band camp..)

And think about it, every single person you've ever slept with wasn't that good, but dammit, we weren't going to let them think any different! ;)

15 Comments:

Blogger Winterswan said...

IMG-$660.60 was my total. I guess I've lived a more interesting life than I'd previously thought....

Wednesday, January 17, 2007 2:38:00 PM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

$355.50

Wednesday, January 17, 2007 8:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

$259.60.

I'm assuming that everything only counts once ...

Wednesday, January 17, 2007 9:04:00 PM  
Blogger LBseahag said...

Nice...I am at $670.60.

I need to quit peeing in pools.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007 9:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

$475.60. I am a champion! I'm a little shy with the streaking/general public nudity, and I managed to dodge jail on more than a few occasions. I think that lowered my score substantially.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007 9:58:00 PM  
Blogger Breazy said...

I am not going to do this meme. I don't want to know my total .. lol! I hope you are doing okay down there in all that cold , we have a system slowly working it's way here. Have a good day!

Thursday, January 18, 2007 6:10:00 AM  
Blogger T. Leach said...

Quick question: Is it $10 for each masturbatory offense?
If so, I'm at $22,385,425.60. If not ... $545.60.

Thursday, January 18, 2007 6:19:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

$475.50 for me. Thanks for the meme.

Thursday, January 18, 2007 6:23:00 AM  
Blogger DaMasta said...

Star - Yeah, um.. I didn't think my life was that interesting either till I started adding up all the fines!

Snav - Care to elaborate??

Dorky Dad - I hope so! Otherwise my fines might look like T. Leach's!

Lbseahag - As long as you don't do it now.. you don't, do you?!

Madmeer - I've evaded the cuffs a few times myself and I still had a rather high score... that means I need to stop making out with strangers at parties..

Breaze - Aw.. come'on! You're no fun! ;) It's still raining here, but it's right above freezing so no problems so far!

T. Leach - Exactly.

Thursday, January 18, 2007 6:32:00 AM  
Blogger DaMasta said...

Jocopo - You're welcome. So I'm assuming that men haven't kissed or made out with the same sex ever.. so how are ya'll getting such high scores?? Hmmm?? :P

Thursday, January 18, 2007 6:33:00 AM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Nope.

Thursday, January 18, 2007 7:20:00 AM  
Blogger Spinning Girl said...

305.50
practically an angel!

Friday, January 19, 2007 4:21:00 PM  
Blogger Logophile said...

I refuse to admit my total
Imma good girl, dammit.

Saturday, January 20, 2007 9:27:00 PM  
Blogger AndyT13 said...

1020.10 and WTF?!?! Does everyone pee in pools but me? Yeesh!
BYW I want to say it FIGURES that my ex (the starfairie) and I have the highest totals here. BTW just for the record whoever came up with these numbers is just nuts. $80 for anal but only $20 for drunk driving? WTF?!?!

Wednesday, January 24, 2007 1:16:00 PM  
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