quesadillas for breakfast

Thank you to the little people who made this blog possible.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Today's Cafeteria Menu:
Chicken Caesar Salad

That's what I've been waiting for all week. A nice healthy salad. A big salad. The big salad [for those of you who watch Seinfeld]. Yesterday's lunch [like yesterday's Astros game] was a catastrophe. Fried chicken? With potatoes? And corn? My stomach is churning just thinking about it. *Blep* I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Let's talk a little today about curses. I never really used to believe in curses or fate or superstitions or any of that mumbo-jumbo out there until about a year ago. It was then that I bought my beloved rings. One is a James Avery Alpha-Omega ring and the other is a silver ring with interlocking circles. The rings don't symbolize anything in particular [well, to me, that is] and that's not the important part. The important part is, every time I wear them, I feel good. Like everything is going to work out. Everything will be alright. But even that's not the important part.

The important part is when I don't wear them. That's when things get interesting.

Two weekends ago, I accidentally left my rings at my cousin's house. She lives on the outskirts of Houston, and while still technically in the city, it's still a good 65 miles away from my house which hardly makes it convenient for me to drive there after work. And it was exactly last week when things here at work started going horribly wrong.

First, let's back up a little.
When I first met DJ Sexy, we talked and flirted and ate lunch together and things were going pretty smoothly. He turned out to be a horny little womanizer, so we decided to just be friends. Plus he still likes to go to clubs, and since the age of 22, I've grown out of the whole club scene.

Fast forward to three weeks ago.
Now, DJ Sexy and I eat lunch with Married IT guy and Party Girl. Married IT guy is funny, charming, an all around good guy. Party Girl is (and I say this in the most loving way) a closet freak. Sure, she's nice, a little dingy at times (and a complete fake), but nice. It bothers me to no end that she sits there and talks about going to raves and going to warehouse parties and dressing goth and listening to house and trance....AND THEN she swears on her life that she doesn't do drugs.... WTF?? And I know I might be stereotyping her but I'm not naive. I've been there, said no to that. I went to UT for cryin' out loud. I know tab poppers when I see 'em. And she, my friend, is a tab popper if I ever saw one. So, whatever, she moves into our lunch group and now we're all friends. We take strict one hour lunches together because I only have an hour, Party Girl has a bitch for a boss, and IT guys are hanging on by the skin of their teeth with their boss.

Fast forward to last week. Right after I left my rings at my cousin's house.
Things have gotten waaaay out of control. DJ Sexy and Party Girl have now gone out two weekends in a row to raves downtown. They engage in conversation that doesn't include me. And what really burns me up inside is they stay at lunch for over an hour! All of a sudden Party Girl is working overtime and is allowed an extra thirty minutes for lunch. All of a sudden DJ Sexy doesn't give a shit what his boss says about late lunches. All of a sudden I'm in this alternate universe where noone in my lunch group hangs on my every word anymore. AND FRANKLY, IT'S FREAKIN' ME OUT. I should point out, in all fairness, that I was [on more than one occasion] invited to join them on their late night excursions to various clubs around Houston, and I [on more than once occasion] politely declined.

And what's worse is that this week Married IT Guy is out on vacation, and I am left faking polite laughter at their obvious inside jokes and conversations. I feel like a fool. I've lost control of the situation, and it will be hard to gain back.

AND, now there are rumors circulating that Party Girl is bi-sexual. And as everyone knows, there's only one thing sexier than a spicy, good looking, Latina [me], it's a bi-sexual girl [Party Girl]. No matter how hideous her face is.

16 Comments:

Blogger Jerk Of All Trades 2.0 said...

Bi-sexual and fugly is NOT hotter than a spicy latin fox....EVER.


ever.


um....ever.



Yeah...EVER.

Never ever.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:05:00 AM  
Blogger Stephanie said...

Have your cousin insure and mail your rings back to you - you'll feel better!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:29:00 AM  
Blogger lookingbusy said...

Are you hiring?

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:31:00 AM  
Blogger Thomcat said...

sounds like you better get those rings back

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:39:00 AM  
Blogger DaMasta said...

Jerk - Thanks, jerk. You made me feel all warm and fuzzy and ... um.. creepy.. inside. ;)

Snavy - Yeah, that's what my cousin and I joked about on the phone last night. Especially with the Astros losing. Yup, that's right. They started losing exactly after I lost my rings.

Looking Busy - We wouldn't hire your lazy ass if you were the finest piece of ass we had ever seen. Ok, maybe ONLY then.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:40:00 AM  
Blogger Bsoholic said...

Have your cousin FedEx those rings STAT!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:48:00 AM  
Blogger lookingbusy said...

Cool, when can I start?

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 9:04:00 AM  
Blogger Breazy said...

in my corner of the world that is called my luck ! If it wasn't for bad luck I would have no luck at all. :) I hope things get better for you soon!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 9:15:00 AM  
Blogger The Village Idiot said...

There is only one way to fix the situation...

spicy latin and um switch hits?

No that probablly wont work

Just be yourself. You said your self that party girl is kind of a fake that always comes around to get you so just be yourself

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 9:22:00 AM  
Blogger DaMasta said...

Thanks, Idiot.

And actually, DJ Sexy has called her out many times about being herself and hiding info about herself... but to no avail. Bisexual still beats out any deviant behavior.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 9:35:00 AM  
Blogger Spinning Girl said...

I just stopped by to show you my new avatar. I made it just for you. :)

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 2:30:00 PM  
Blogger DaMasta said...

SG - OHMYGOD! GET THAT FUCKING THING AWAY FROM ME!! AAAAAHHHH...



.......(runs away screaming)

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 2:33:00 PM  
Blogger Thomcat said...

is that a quesadilla with arms ?

word verification
psmzmuwk

that's what i think my boss told me to do ... well, that's what it sounded like

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 2:54:00 PM  
Blogger S said...

That't just not fair! Get those rings back ASAP, and get some new lunch buddies!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 3:01:00 PM  
Blogger Sherri Sanders said...

Yes, get the rings back!!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 6:37:00 PM  
Blogger DaMasta said...

Thom - that is SO not a quesadilla with arms. you WISH that was a quesadilla with arms.

Barefoot - Fair. Schmair. I WANT MY RINGS BACK.

*****EVERYONE******
i JUST GOT MY COUSIN AN INTERVIEW HERE ON FRIDAY!! MY RINGS WILL BE HERE ON FRIDAY!!! SONOVABITCH!! I AM SOOO HAPPY!!

Wednesday, October 26, 2005 7:02:00 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home