Things I've Learned While Being a Receptionist:
1. If I wear a skirt that is so short that it shows the elastic in my pantyhose, I will be made fun of.
2. If I pretend to speak Mexican to the cooks, they will give me an extra scoop of eggs in my breakfast tacos.
3. If I leave during lunch, I'll lose my parking space and end up walking 15 mins back to work.
4. If I leave my internet up, the chick from HR who relieves me will job search.
5. If you request that the company buy different glue sticks, you will start getting hate mail from the Purchasing Dept.
6. If a customer calls to complain, they will insist on telling you the whole story before you can say, "Sorry but I can't help you, you need to call customer service."
Things I Still Haven't Figured Out:
1. Why we have to pay for coffee.
2. Why I have 15 glue sticks, 3 clip boards, 2 staplers -- but only 1 pen.
3. Why I have a microphone but no paging system.
4. Why everyone waits by the stairs for the elevator when we only have 2 floors.
5. Why someone from within the building keeps calling me and askng if I've seen her dog.
6. Why buyer's assistants have assistants.
posted by DaMasta @ 4:30 PM
14 Comments:
lol !!! - you have to pay for coffee ?!? i'd strike !
Well......HAVE you seen her damn dog?
If you have nice legs, I would NEVER make fun of you for having the elastic showing. In fact you could slap me around, make me look for her dog and I'D pay for your coffee!
Nice first number two. That sounds like an idea, hehe.
Maybe you should use your microphone to ask your coworkers to be on the look out for that damn dog. It's probably playing with my damn rooster at the moment!
You could use the microphone for karoke!
A simple "hola, chinga tu madre" little gets you an extra scoop of eggs? Thats better than free coffee..
I think the mexicans found the dog; and used it for the wet-taco soup.
Ask for rubber cement instead of gluesticks....at least u can huff it during down time..
Or you could use the microphone for faking CB Radio talk.
"This is reception 1, requesting CUBE 4, What's your 20? do you copy? Over"
Paying for coffee must suck, it's one of the only things we don't have to pay for at my place
gareth - I think they found the dog. It peed on the floor in the hallway by the back door. I never saw it after that. ...wait, i don't think I EVER saw it.
Thom - Muffins cost less than coffee.
jerk - I DO have a nice ass.
angela - We do have a 50s themed singing contest coming up..
jinxy - I will never, I repeat, NEVER eat soupy taco again.
15 evil llama glue sticks???
Put and out of order sign on the elevator -- make em walk!!
Wait....nice ass.....one moment....yes....the judges will accept that answer.
Yes, Snavylyn, 15 llama gluesticks and NO MORE blonde gluesticks. I actually put an out of order sign on the elevator once and they pushed the button to see if it worked, and it did, and they ripped down the sign.
jerk - and I have a great rack. But that doesn't have anything to do with a skirt.
Love it, too funny...I should come up with something for my job, I collect money all day and make salesmen wait salesboys fear me.
Things I have learned to accept where I work:
1. The stainless steel non spill mug club. If you want to be part of the crowd, it is a prerequisite that you carry one of these non spill coffee mugs at all times, preferably the stainless steel version.
2. When your quiet and wear glasses, everyone presumes your a genius.
3. Never volunteer to assist anyone in a project. By the end, you will have done all the work and they will have reaped all the benefit.
Baby, you had me at ass, don't go throwin' worms in the water when the fish is already in the boat.
(I've been practicing my Dr. Phil-isms!)
LOL, Jerk!
But I do!! It's the truth! I'd go into detail about them, but there's no sense in that if you're already "hooked".
Post a Comment
<< Home